Dwarf Hunting in Wroclaw

Wroclaw may be a great place for mysteries if you are into that sort of thing, but one thing is certain: it is surely a great place to go dwarf hunting.

Just walk around – and when you see one, or better: two, perhaps even three – …

… walk over and shoot. That’s how easy it is.

Pop! Got another one.

The great thing about the Wroclaw dwarves is that they are not exactly in hiding. Sweet and trusting creatures, that’s what they are: easy prey.

And they can be found virtually everywhere around the city centre, above all next to the most interesting parts of the Old Town: around the Rynek, for example, the market square, …

… the adjacent Salt Market (Plac Solny), …

… and under the archway between the medieval “Hansel and Gretel” houses (Jas i Malgosia).

Dwarves also lounge around wherever there is a house of worship, sometimes sheltering underneath the church itself. Would you believe it! They can be quite resourceful, those little things.

Some of the dwarves can be spotted in the districts on the fringe of downtown Wroclaw, by the side of the roads to the suburbs …

… but overall, in my observation, what they don’t do is roam around a lot. They seem to be pretty much glued to one spot.

Some are trying to make themselves useful, …

… doing some sort of community service, …

… but others just hang around all day long, like bums on a street corner.

And, I am sad to report, not all of them manage to convey the impression that they are entirely sober.

You can shoot them when you see them, but it is also fun to first “case the joint” a little.

Some of the best prepared hunters are little girls. They come equipped with lists of places of where to spot them, but they nearly always have more senior people around to pull the trigger for them. Kids! Amateurs!

So, you may ask, where do these dwarves come from?

The whole thing started in the 1980s when a single dwarf was released in the town centre by students as some sort of protest against the government. (Don’t ask!)

The dwarves spread more widely in the early 2000s, when art students picked up the idea – students again! I always knew they have too much time on their hands! – and the whole thing got a bit out of hand.

Twelve dwarves in 2004 became about 100 in 2009, and after that, the dwarf population tripled within a mere couple of years.

This year, their number is expected to reach 1000 if it has not done so already.

Some rate of reproduction that is, considering that – well, ahem … how can I put it politely: considering that the dwarf population seems to be overwhelmingly male.

In fact, I would estimate that there are about ten males for every female. The females of the species, meanwhile, may be few but they are easy to spot: they are the ones who do not tend to grow beards.

So how do these guys manage to multiply at such breakneck speed? For dwarf hunters, that is the real mystery of Wroclaw, not some stuff about islands or invisible Germans as last week’s post had it.

To borrow the phrase developed by academics who have gathered a lot of data that do not seem to suggest any firm conclusion: the dwarves’ breeding habits “require more research”.

Feel like taking up the challenge? If you ever happen to visit Wroclaw, perhaps you should keep an eye on those little fellas.

At any rate, dwarf hunting in the city streets is a Small Game Safari that comes with a guarantee for Big Fun.

Dwarf hunting in Wroclaw will certainly put the excitement in your visit to this Polish town.